Statistically, I feel like everyone experiences a terrible Christmas at least once in their lives. It's normal to have a bad day, but on Christmas it almost seems criminal to experience. I experienced such a bad day last year when a prolonged anxiety attack paired with crippling depression landed me in the ER on Christmas Day. This year, I've found myself remembering where I was a year ago, and reflecting on what I've learned.

The Christmas season is one that is filled with sensory elements that are unlike any other season throughout the year. There are many sights, sounds, and smells that are so unique to Christmas. And since such things tend to cement memories, this season has been filled with a lot of flashbacks to last year. However, not all of them have been bad. This year, I found myself thinking about what the entire meaning of this season is and realizing just how intentional God is in using everything.

One of the biggest things I learned over this past year was the true value of God's grace. I've gone into detail on this in my book and other blog posts, but it's truly something that I took for granted for a good part of my Christian life. Grace is unmerited favor. Grace is freeing. Grace is healing. Grace is everything. And it's exactly what God sent His son here to accomplish. Because of Christmas, I've been given the gift of grace.

Recently I've been doing a devotional that is a Bible verse a day. I personally (having done a variety of different Bible studies) am really enjoying the small chunk format that this study puts it in for me. It gives me the ability to really break down the context and etymology of each verse, and as a result get more out of it. Yesterday was a jam-packed Christmas Eve and admittedly, I missed my quiet time. I find myself often wondering (even though it's ridiculous) if the day I missed is a word for yesterday rather than today. Neglecting to remember, of course, that God factored in my mishap. Today, I opened up what was supposed to be the verse for yesterday and found that my missing yesterday actually led me to such an important reminder from God today. This was the verse:

"For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God—" - Ephesians 2:8 (NIV)

God reminded me through this that even though last year's Christmas brought a great deal of pain, tears, and memories that I will not soon forget; it also brought a renewed sense of what grace really is. Each year from this year on, I will see Christmas for what it really is: an opportunity to thank God for the gift of His son and the many gifts that come as a result of his sacrifice; one of them being grace.